Steve Dakota & His Grill

Somewhere in Marion OH is a real place to eat called Steve Dakota Grill. Somewhere in the title of the "grill" is an apostrophe and an S, but where those lie, I will never know. Is it a Dakota Grill owned by Steve? Or is Steve's last name Dakota? I order the only mediterranean dish on the menu and stare at the decor, 80 percent of which is real taxidermy. They say Steve shot it himself. the other 20% is antler chandeliers and antique movie posters about hunting in Africa. I drank a Red Stripe. The caesar salad had a hard boiled egg in it, no croutons. whatever.

We arrived at four. A woman turned 56, such an occasion demanded we be there. Early dinner. I would be able to catch the League's All-Star game at 8pm back in the capital city, maybe sing some karaoke in the process. I figured I would work on my "Word Up" by Cameo while the game was on (appropriate)- but it was all for not. Steve Dakota and his grill had rendered me moot. Instead, I droned away on the couch barely watching anything while sipping a mason jar filled with Seagram's Gin, Pellegrino, and lemon juice out of one of those little plastic bottles that looks like a lemon. I could have seen Xavier's David West in his first All-Star game. Or maybe it was Bret Michael's Rock of Love - Mud Bowl 2. I couldn't really tell. Really there are a lot of similarities when you think about it.





The few things that stuck out in mind about the League's weekend: Dwight was the only guy whose shirt was tucked-in at the dunk contest's introductions - I'm positive he won because of it. Steve Nash was rocking Nike's new recycled shoe, "Trash Talk." (uh, ok) - and Lebron's dunk in the end where he put the game away while karate-chopping Dirk in the neck was the MVP moment of the game. Seriously. No one cared about Basketball Jesus 2.0's (5) 3's in 19 minutes of play. It was the karate-chop.

One final note: worst all-star game jerseys ever. ever. depending on which way you are running down the court, you could be on either team. sounds perfect. I mean, the game is meaningless, right?